Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
