So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize