His pubic hair was longer than his dick
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
