No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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