just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
