they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
