No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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