Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
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