just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Randomize
