But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
