just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
