Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
40s are totally the cure
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize