i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
