You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He shit in the fireplace
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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