We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
