also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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