Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Watching her eat just hurts me
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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