I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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