Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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