Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize