Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
