"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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