I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
My bed smells like the plague
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
