just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
