His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Are we still banned from the library?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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