I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize