just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
