did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
