i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
