so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
