i just wanna soil my oats bro
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
