Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize