your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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