That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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