I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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