Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
sarcasm needs its own font
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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