will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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