i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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