Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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