I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
