How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
