I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
