Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
