I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You need a sexual gate keeper
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
