Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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