you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
