i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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