We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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