ya dads aren't the best wingmen
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Less talking, more tequila
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
