the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
